OUR RATING:
White-Collar Crime Never Sounded So Good
Oh joy, another true crime podcast to add to the approximately seven billion options already clogging your podcast feed. But hang on a second… “Swindled” isn’t about serial killers or mysterious disappearances. No, it’s about white-collar crime, corporate greed, and corruption. Nothing says “relaxing commute entertainment” quite like learning how the ultra-wealthy are actively destroying society while facing minimal consequences. (waves hands and arms around pointing at everything).
The anonymous host, who goes by “A Concerned Citizen”, delivers stories of fraud, environmental disasters, and corporate malfeasance with all the emotional range of a calculator. But somehow, perhaps owing to the formatting of the podcast, his somewhat monotone delivery manages to be both soothing and deeply unsettling. What’s the best way to describe this listening experience? Imagine your GPS voice assistant suddenly describing how pharmaceutical companies knowingly got America hooked on opioids. It’s a real mood.
Each episode details how some corporate executive or corrupt politician managed to scam their way to millions while stepping on the necks of everyday people. It’s basically a how-to guide for aspiring sociopaths, except with the occasional moral judgment thrown in. The way the host breaks down complex financial crimes is definitely a recipe for feeling a bit more informed, but far more enraged and depressed about humanity. What a gift!
The podcast follows a delightful formula: introduction to seemingly upstanding person or company, revelation of their absolute moral bankruptcy, description of the minimal consequences they faced, and then you’re left to stew in your own helpless rage. What? Am I the only one who enjoys bedtime stories that end with “and then the villain won, built a space rocket with their ill-gotten gains, and everyone else suffered forever? Sweet dreams!”
“Swindled” is a rare duck in the true crime genre. It features an uncanny ability to make you grow more paranoid about everything, wait… let me think about that for a second. Yes, everything. Think that charity is doing good work? Wrong. The CEO is probably using donations to fund their third vacation home. Believe that corporation’s environmentally friendly messaging? How adorable of you to think they’re not actively dumping chemicals into a river somewhere. Trust in regulatory agencies? Oh, you sweet nuclear winter child.
But perhaps the show’s greatest achievement is making you feel intellectually superior for listening to it while simultaneously making you feel like an absolute sucker in the grand scheme of things. You’ll find yourself nodding along, thinking “I would never fall for such an obvious scam,” only to realize halfway through that you’ve been unknowingly participating in at least three similar systems your entire adult life. It’s cognitive dissonance as entertainment. Good times.
The most infuriating aspect of “Swindled” is how it reveals the astounding lack of justice in most of these cases. The formula becomes painfully predictable: horrific crime, thousands affected, millions stolen, multiple lives ruined, and then, gasp!—a $50,000 fine and six months of probation.
The bonus episodes available to Patreon supporters offer even more depressing content, because apparently, the regular feed doesn’t provide enough existential dread. Paying extra for additional disillusionment is perhaps the most appropriate business model for a podcast about capitalism’s failures. The irony is not lost on me, nor on the “Concerned Citizen,” who seems to be in on the joke that is our entire economic system.
In the end, “Swindled” is the podcast equivalent of eating your vegetables. if those vegetables were laced with small doses of poison that accumulate in your system over time until you can no longer trust any institution or authority figure.
It’s educational, infuriating, and oddly addictive. So go ahead and listen if you want to ruin your day repeatedly while still somehow feeling intellectually nourished.
Where to listen to Swindled
Episodes.fm | Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Overcast | Pocket Casts | Castro
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